abramface

nope—-none

I am going to name my Owl Genesis. I am going to name my two daughters Shelton and Apple. I claim those names. Apple will be the youngest. Shelton will be exactly 6 years older than Apple. Hopfully this all works out the way I plan.

Do you want to know the real reason for the name “abramface”?

I’m so terribly sorry to disapoint you. asuming you care..  which was a mistake..

I dont even know. i was looking at the name “abramface” on my blog header.

abram.. “FACE”?  The purpose of this blog is NOT to analyze my face…

SO why face. Why not “abramleg” or “abramneck” other than the obvious reason of an awkward phrase in general.

When i was a young lad i would change my email 100 times for no reason as all young children do. i realized that this was not practical on many levels.

So when a starred at the little gmail box asking what name i wanted, i sat there being over come with rather strong vibes of the most concecrated  intensity ever known to anyone. the first thing that came to my little head was abramface.  The big green words  of AVALIBLE soothed me quite nicely.

So really there os no “behind the Scenes of abramface” its actually quite a boring story.

The purpose of this post was definatly not to disperse my email. i just realized that..

***

Also if anyone has a small statue of a decepticon and an owl eating watermellon together feel free to donate. to abramface

She sat in the dirty chair in the bank as she unpatiently waited for her mother to be finished. She sat there picking at the unfortunatly gray and rather smelly foam that once was white and crisp. a man standing a few feet away reaches into his pocket and grabs a candy wrapped in a yellow transparent crunchy paper like substance. He carelessly opens it and eats it leaving the wrapper all alone in mid air as it drops to the cold dirty bank floor. The wind from the fan above  softly blows the yellow wrapper acros the grainy floor making a tiny little noise that the girl detected. She curiously picked the wrapper up. The yellow color of the wrapper instantly reminded the young girl of the yellow paint she spilled on her mothers shirt the other day. She felt so scared and guilty of how she was going to get it out and keep it a secret until she could. Later that day when the girl  and her mother were home, she ran upstairs the the laundry room with her mothers ruined shirt. she put it in the wash but want sure how much soap or what kind she should use. She picked up a large plastic container that said “bleach” on it she emptied the thing of bleach into the washer hoping to clean the shirt. Her mother called her down to eat dinner. She first had to get rid of the empty thing of bleach. She ran outside barefoot and slipped on the ice hard. a boy next door looking thru the window count help but laugh hysterically. His older brother asked what he was laughing about. Before the older brother could even here his little brother out he rememberd something funny that they had been trying to remember earliar. Their older sister came out of her room wondering why they were being so loud. she gazed across the room at the cold glass of water that the older brother had sitting on the coffee table next to him. She realized how thirsty she was. She walked over and took a drink and coundt stop because she was so thirsty. The older brother sad “I just got that, go fill it back up” with slight anger. She smiled and softly said sorry. On her way to the kitchen she noticed something rather strange. There was a semi large stuffed animal on the couch across the room even further direction from her brothers in the room next door. She picked up the stuffed owl very curiously and slowly thinking maybe it was for her from a boy. As she rubbed its fluffy skin she felt something hard on its upper chest. She peeled away the fluff and found a small blinking red light. She continued to further peel it away and absolutely snapped with fear as she saw the little camera hidden in the stuffed owl zoom in and out trying to focus on her. Her brothers came running in. The scary man controlling the camera that had been secretly filming the happenings of that house was furious that his cover had been blown. He slammed his desk and stood up in a fast loud manner. He glanced down at the jar of yellow candies he had which reminded him of the one he had earlier that day in the bank.

I call this the unfortunate and mostly fictional circle of life.

Owl 1

Owl 2

Owl 3

Owl 4

Which Owl is the best?

Is this not the coolest thing alive?

melosticomatism: -Verb The act of going in a room without locking the door, containing false memory on the way out of locking it previously in which you “unlock it” but actually lock it. abram. no. you just took the unnecessary rout of  locking yourself in.

Sentence: The small undereducated child found itself in the mere  act of stupidity entitled melosticomatism.

maxitaboverdrive: [maxee-tabover-drive] -Noun Over dousing on Tabasco to the point that puts its victim in a state of indescribable pain and uncomfort.

Sentence: The boy was in sad state of maxitaboverdrive. He then began to curl into a silent ball in the corner to calm this burning sensation.

invermavoling: -Verb The act of walking backwards and drinking any liquid beverage simontaniously.

Sentence: The girl was invermavoling perfectly until she spilled that purple kool-aid all down her white dress.

The title of this post is pretty self explanatory.

Me and my dad went driving  on a strange road that we were always curious about.  the small dirt road winds up a steep jungly mountain with vines hanging everywhere slapping against the car as we drive. there are a million forks in the road which made it hard to not get lost. We found a spot where you can see playa minas from very high up which was cool.

Long story short: we also found a super small little beach hidden by ..pretty much everything.  so on the way down to it i fell into a masive mud spot. up to my knees in mud. i got out but my lofer didnt make it! so i reached into the 2 feet of mud and grabed my shoe. in the prosses i lost my other shoe. if these were just any shoes it would not be a big deal. but it was my loafers. i practicly raised the the little guys..  some pivotal life changing moments took place with my lofers on.  i have been thru so much with them. crazy unspoken bonding moments between boy and shoe.  stop laughing you have no idea.

so my father thought it would be funny to say a few words as if it were a funeral. he said  ”you have been a good soul”…

So I have four  Specific people that are very missed and or loved today especially.

First one is My amazing sister Mariah that is now living here in Costa Rica with me. Not so much missed anymore but well loved indeeeeed. I am so exited to have her here these next four months.

Second is my beautiful cousin Taylor Allred! Kinda random, I don’t know why but I seriously miss that girl like non other. Shes so cool. I’m exited to possibly move to St. George which would be closer to her family when I come back to the states.

Next would be Kylee Labrum. NOTE:  {I am definatly NOT puting these in order best to least or vice-virsa} So Little shout out to my georgious little friend Kylee in AZ.

Last but not least would be My well missed Older brother Alex. He can’t see this cause hes on the mission but thats okay. I love him so much. along with the rest of the amazing people I wrote about.

Mariah

Taylor & abram

Kylee

Elder Martinsen

oh I know I said FOUR but theres one MORE. [I believe My DISCOURSE  just rhymed.. non intentional OF COURSE...  ] I promise that I caped them after the fact.  anyway BENSON PAYNE. enough said.

I would like to announce two things. not quite sure to who cause this is new. The first one is. Abram now has a blog..  and the second  is that I have recently taken a rather strong liking to my sister Mariah.